Yea, ppl annoy me with this too! It's been 3 yrs since my bf passed by suicide. Our relationship was near it's end when it happened. Honestly, I should have ended it w/ in 2 mos instead of 2 yrs. It was an unhealthy relationship with someone who had major issues, who's family was very toxic and enabling. I kinda dated a guy, who was a friend prior, a yr later after my bf suicided, I didn't want to get serious and he didn't push it, we just mostly enjoyed each others company and we are very good friends now. 18 mos after my bf passed I got into a relationship w/ a good friend of 8 yrs. The relationship only lasted 2 mos. In hindsight I should have never given him a chance, he played too many games, even though he knew all that I had been through prior. But I don't regret it, b/c it showed me that I could open my heart, trust in love again, and allow myself to feel those feelings. We've been broken up for over a year. Right after we broke up I went on dates for 2 months and I absolutely hated it! Everyone wanted to get serious ASAP, clingy and stuff, which I can't stand. I have absolutely no desire to go on a date, be in a relationship, so on. I have a history of picking the wrong guys, who end up being exactly what I don't want and need, jealous, possesive, controling. I don't want to deal with that again. Nor the immaturity, co-dependency that I've dealt with when it came to men in the past.
The first yr after my bf suicided I told ppl to not even talk to me about meeting someone, setting me up, going on a date, so on. I needed that year to grieve, to eventually becoming someone who was ok with not having to have someone, instead of having to have someone.
So going into yr 3, of course I hear it all of the time from ppl, it's time to move on, yada, yada! I try to explain it's not just my bf's suicide, it's all the bad choices I've made in men in my life. I'm enjoying being alone, the freedom that comes with it! A place that many of my friends have never been able to handle doing for themselves, b/c they always have to have someone and honestly 99.9% of the friends that are in relationships, are miserable!
I'll give you a quote that kinda applies though it's from the actor Johnny Depp, "Just keep moving forward and don't give a s*%t about what anyone thinks. Do what you have to do, for you!" In saying moving forward, I'm meaning keep doing what you have to do, grieving and so on, to get through this, and don't care what anyone thinks you "need" to do! Do what you have to do for you and don't do what others want you to, that of which you don't feel ready to do nor feel like that's what you want to do.
I absolutely hate when a guy is giving me advice, not out of being a caring friend, but for their attempt at their own gain! Especially the idiots who think the solution is to offer to be my bed buddy! AGH! I want to say to them, "What would make you think that's anything near what I need? I have no bed buddy, so what would make you think you'd be the one out of all the men out there to change my mind?" They act like they're doing you a favor, like you're gonna gain something from it! Do they actually expect me to say, "Oh yes, I was just thinking when I woke up this morning, I need a bed buddy, that will solve everything, that will make me feel 100% better and loved and cared about, if only my prince would come along and offer to be my bed buddy, then you came along and offered it, it must be meant to be, my dream has come true, thank you for making my dream come true prince charming, how soon can we get this started?"