Lost Mom - Suicidal 10-Year-Old Son

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Lost Mom - Suicidal 10-Year-Old Son

Post by SingleMomLost81 » Tue Jul 25, 2017 12:39 pm

Hi Everyone,

I am new here and have a 10-year-old son who has made suicidal threats. I have been there and am an adoptee and was bullied growing up and ended up doing home-school in the end. My son is going into 5th grade this Fall and was bullied and had his snack/foods from lunch every day taken from him. He is severe ADHD with tendencies of Autism. Last month, he threatened to kill himself and said he hated his life, he has no friends, and didn't want to live anymore. This was of course, at school, and the counselors called me and I left work to go get him. Where we live, the counselors have to ask if he has a plan (this was the 2nd time he's said this in school) and he said he would go back home (we're not originally from here) and get a gun. Nobody in our family has a one so not sure where he had received that idea from.

I've been a single mother since I was 5 months pregnant and am at a loss. My sister is a school psychologist for children (more severe than my son) where she works and offered to take him home (we're originally from NYS and live in VA). We have no family close by and I have no friends to really talk to or hang out with who could understand. As someone who was depressed at 12 and he is 10, if anyone has any support, suggestions, etc. please let me know. We are set to have him go home and live with my sister, her husband, and their 2 kids (they're 19 and almost 18) and adore my son. My parents will take him every weekend plus they miss him obviously. He said he does not want to come back to VA and I don't blame him.

I moved here about 4 years ago and it's been difficult and I am seeing someone who we live with and we've been together 2.5 years and things are most of the time fine. When he does not get his way he throws a fit, says he wants to die, or if you take away things from him because you asked him to do something he will say those things. Is it out of attention and he's mad because of it? I don't know for sure. He was in a treatment center for a week last month and I have to give my custody rights to my sister so she can take care of him, put him on her insurance, make any medical decisions for him, etc. I am so scared and worried I am losing my son and I think if he goes home, he won't come back and I plan to visit once a month or every other month (trying to find a job that will be flexible without giving all the details).

I could use some support or help.. or questions. He was taken off his ADHD medication due to the symptoms its brings on in boys especially his age with psychosis, mania, and depression. He's only on a mood stabilizer (Trileptal) and eventually he may go on Intuniv (non-stimulant). He was on the liquid form of Concerta - Quilliavent (spelling sorry).

Has anyone dealt with this? Emotionally-socially he is unstable and behaviorally if he does not get his way (he said this himself) he will say those things. I guess I just am lost and feel like I'm a horrible mother for sending him home but that's where the support is and my sister and her family (her in-laws are wonderful to him too) and my parents. His father left and we have not spoken in 6 years.

Thanks for listening..

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Re: Lost Mom - Suicidal 10-Year-Old Son

Post by Karyl » Fri Aug 04, 2017 10:35 am

Dear Lost Mom,

It seems to me that you need to get the school counselor involved as soon as you can, and also the head of the special education department, because the treatment your son is experiencing is wrong and probably illegal.

You mentioned sending your son back home to live with your sister. Can you also move back home so that you can stay together?

This has to be a difficult situation for you. Sending hugs.

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