After the funeral we attempted to make peace. We don't have a desire to hurt each other...although when I went to the gym the other day I beat the hell out of a punching bag thinking about him and what he did.
How do I forgive and forget in relation to him. I honestly feel its a huge roadblock for me to get anywhere. I know Kristin wanted us to be friends at one time. I just honestly don't see it happening. Seeing all her friends and family support him as well is kind of tough. This includes the ones that know the full story and admitted to me they were pissed at him for what he did and thanked me for what I did to make her happy.
I'm lost on what to do. Any advice?
Him: Why did you unfriend me Jason? Did something happen?
Me: No...I'm just having a real tough time moving on G. I mean real tough. I'm sure ur having ur issues too. It's nothing against you. I just think right now in my heart I need to cut this tie for a while.
Him: If that is truly how you feel about this I can accept that, but why can't two people who cared for Kristin stay friends on FB. If I have done something to upset you then I'm sorry, but I thought we were going to help each other thru this whole ordeal. Please know that I still want us to be friends and to cherish what each had with her. I still am planning on taking you fishing this summer!
Me: OK..I'll re add but I'm not guaranteeing it moving past Facebook. I'll see about the fishing trip. I know you want me to go. You've mentioned it a few times as since Kristin went and caught a big one you wanted me to. I'm having a hard enough time doing stuff she did with me. Doing it with her husband is going to be tougher. And I'm finding out what you went through with Kristin and when she was talking about me. Was at Kate and Bryan's and Bryan wanted me to play a game that you guys used to play when you and her went over to hang out. He mentioned it a number of times and like you said about getting tired of hearing about me...I'm not comfortable hearing about you guys. I really just want to focus on what I had with her. Not what you did.
Him: I understand, but thank you anyways.
I did readd him but I set my privacy so he sees nothing on my wall and I unfollowed him. He's just listed as a friend. It just seems there is more for him to gain than there is for me. I can't help him. I don't want his help. I hope he finds his peace and happiness. I hope he finds the woman he was looking for. Kristin even told me early on she wanted the same thing and that eventually the four of us could be friends. While I still hope he does find someone...he's going to need help raising a 13 year old girl, I don't want to be a part of it! Just like if someday I find someone who meets my new expectations I sure as hell don't want him to be a part of it. I understand they had a long history and a child.... I understand that I had 6 months. In my eyes those 6 months are more important to me than the 13+ years they had. I just want to remember what we had. Not what they had.